Can beauty be intimidating askers online dating
“You’re surrounded by ingenuine people, and therefore lack the knowledge of how to form good, honest relationships.” Because of all the attention, she said, beautiful people often become obsessed with how other people perceive them, which can ultimately lead to a pronounced insecurity.
“At one point I felt like I was dating a teenage girl,” she said.
Not to mention that people get away with so much more when they’re attractive.”And that’s not just true of relationships; it's true of life in general.
It’s a widely documented psychological phenomenon that good-looking people are perceived by others as being better people overall—as being nicer, more intelligent, better at their jobs, and yes, better to date. Hamermesh, author of , there are also many economic benefits to looking good, from higher wages at work to getting better deals on loans.
But according to Millie, all of this unearned praise and attention can present problems in relationships.
“When you’re a model, or just extremely good-looking, people are constantly telling you that you’re beautiful, but those people usually want something from you,” she told me.
I told him that, at 31, the realization was probably a bit overdue, but I knew what he meant: As one gets older, it becomes harder and harder to be attracted to someone simply because of the way they look.
Is it because, with age, we care more about a relationship’s potential longevity, rather than just instant sexual gratification?
Or perhaps we become more acutely aware of the impermanence of beauty after experiencing our own signs of aging?
But, as un-shallow as I have congratulated myself for being on many occasions, I will admit that there have been times when someone’s looks overwhelmed any need for a deeper compatibility.
Case in point: A couple years ago, I dated a writer whose work I really admired—he was kind and intelligent, we got along wonderfully, and the sex was good, too.